...loop...and why?

Buy new shoes
to put old shoes
In the shoes closet
Of old shoes
made complete
by the new shoes
put into shoes closet
and why?

Christmas

Un-inhibited and un-leashed
as if good blood was infused
in the un-hidden veins and hidden venules
to make both eyes glitter
with forgiveness
of granting one and another happiness
without fears of tomorrow ever coming
subconsciously unaware that
today is a creation out of nothing
and that tomorrow is also a creation
out of everything that was yesterday
Un-inhibited and un-leashed.

Freedom's Laughter

are you -free
when you're -slave
to your -will
to live-?

Contradictions of Capitalism

Dear editor, Christian Children's Funds ad calling for the elimination of child hunger appears right after Flush the Fat.

e^(pi*i) + 1 = 0

Creation in mathematics
Application in physics
Observation in science
All three in Art
Originated by kama kama moukamou

2009

Special Countdown
With Count in
And count up
left and right.

To the god of softness

Let it stOrm, let it st0rm, let it storm

9

You start a story,
I will finish it.
/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/

8

In a world where
Misery needs company,
Company needs compassion.

7

Insanity is to reconcile
An overwhelming urge to speak
With an overwhelming conviction
That silence is the most appropriate response
Out-come is in-stitutionalization.

I love you

I kill you.

In the school of life

The educated never graduate.

Hi & Lo

Don't drive with high beam light,
You'll disturb the eyes of night,
and I dwell in the night.

abc's

Live fast, die young and leave a good-looking corpse.

Blockade entourage

I am blocked.
Please come back again later.

If love is a spiced dark chocolate

I love the light and sweet taste of it.

...loyalty and honesty dilemma...

...honesty will be honest without anything to lose...
...loyalty once abused is lost...

Lost

I was lost in the
Ally of ideas
and events
which

mpcqifakodflsossri

Celebration of commemoration of declaration of mpcqifakodflsossri

You want me to tell you the title but

Can you leave?
I want to eat now.

Across, your universe

Overseen clashes are ceased over seas
But clashes overseen are never ceased.

Inferno Festiv

Spear-headed into the oblivious darkness of desires
Flapping wings steadily on the strawflowers
The butterflies asked for nothing but the willpower
When light of fire overcooked the wings for power

The inconvenient truth

Frightened by the power of language
and duality of words.
Ay! There's the rub.

Cold world made of gold

Center field of a one fold world
Is violent with untold scolds
Mold a scaffold on the second fold
Tell the world of the battlefield of gold

You can't want

what you want

/\.\/

Believing is as dangerous as disbelieving.

Dancing in the moonlight

gogo and didi and momo and pipi and jojo and hoho and blabla

Laugh

Lots of it.

*_*

I want nothing more than a warm bed
and a clear conscience.

[no I am lying]

6

Language comes from humility
Silence from wholeness

Pomegranate

Raspberry
Green
Tea
Hot
Brewed for five minutes.

Reality of dreams

Aggravation
-drawn out of a dream world.

Happiness
-woven dreams in the face of reality.

pq

qp

Stroke

Heart palpitation
Galaxy reorientation
Hibernating intuition
Deconstructed institution

wide wild west

world wide web

5

Wrote my heart out.
Can't wait to read my heart out.

About me

I burn, slowly, in the love of my lung's devotion,
sometimes happily and sometimes sadly.

Heaven and Hell

When you slowly burn
in the love of
your lung's devotion
are you in hell?
or heaven?

Laughter

If the lungs
ever knew what they miss
when they force out air from a narrow passage
to the outside world
to add alittle bit of something
to someone else's life
without ever seeing another lung
of their kind
they would never stay inside
the body.
I burn in the love of my lung's devotion.

I am the sunshine.

I am a ray of light
reflected by the clouds
diffracted by water droplets
and absorbed fully and only by
myself.

Music

Never gets old.

I am weak

but I am strong.

Universe is a becoming

If I was a dream,
I could be coming true.

Universe is a see-saw

Snowflakes melt on my cheeks to make them cold
and snowflakes melt on my cheeks to get warm.

Food for thought

Rien en vain j'interroge!

&

I am time and space
Therefore I
Do not fit in my body.

Take it or

Leave it.

][

////
\\\\\

\\\\\
////

Self reflection

322 rants, babbles, blames, conflicts, complications, darknesses, lightnesses, and what-nots, and I still have not said what I intend to say! Here's a plan: I plan to say what I want to say by February! I will celebrate my baby blog's one-year anniversary, and stop even if I fail to say what I want to say. Thereafter this blog is going to be confiscated, until further notice. So enjoy, while the sun of my rants shines.

4

I kiss a tree
Covered with frost
My lips freeze.

echo

o
o
o
o

Falling winter

Yellow is beautiful
only when music is blue.

/=[...]=\

This is RoBo.
Say hi to RoBo.

I wish I was a robot

Dead inside.

I am cold

Nov.15,08

A brick fell

Hello darkness,
my old friend
were you looking
when I was gone
in the light?
Was I gone
too far
too long?
I am still
the same
but older.
Years older.
I have to admit
that I forgot you
But I want to
get to know you
again.
Will you
let me?
let me?
let me?
let me?
let me?


[The brick wall echoes back with its sound of silence. You see, the wall is made of brick]

Shakespeare never swore

You,
Beetle-headed
Boil and clay brained
Dismal-dreaming
Idle-headed
Pox-marked
Milk-livered
Fat-kidneyed
Dizzy-eyed
Ill-nurtured
Flap-mouthed
Fool-born
Half-faced
Hasty-witted
human creature.

Nothing in particular

To kids
Never dream of becoming an adult,
Kids are among the best adults, before they grow up.

To adults
Never assume,
It's almost as dangerous as thinking.

To everyone else
I have nothing to say,
Until I have something to say.

To myself
Take a break.

>-<

Truth is when believing and not believing are both possible.

Life of a monument

Carved out of lime stones
By the crafted hands of a sculptor
Accessorized with a diamond knife
Came a body into existence.
The sculptor breathed life
Into the monument
And the body traveled around the world.
On its way, the monument
Came across a carved sculptor
Out of lime stones with a hand
Accessorized with a diamond knife
Who breathed life into itself
By carving monuments out of lime stones.

A mermaid who ate the world

I find wooden boats more attractive
When colors get more depletive

I go on sailing trips in the sea
paddling towards a one-way dream

The ropes at the shore pull me back in
When I go too far to see a big bluefin

I know someday in deep blue sea
I will find things right, inside of me

je llo

je ne finis du lire le livre et mange fumee poulet
je pense mon sens du humor etes trop horrible, ce ne pas etes drole
je suis fatigue maintenant

Fire on Ice

This comfortable uneasiness
between freezing waters
and firing flames

I am fire

This uncomfortable easiness
between firing waters
and freezing flames

I am ice

3

Sojourn to the tropics and savor the fruits of the alluring continent. Organic African rooibos leaves teaming with mango, vanilla and blossoms. Antioxidant rich, brewed for five minutes.

nunitheg sensuddag

makoupipi si si
si si makoupipi
moukamou kamakama
kamakama moukamou
lulamumbaba chi chi
chi chi lulamumbaba
ar stay east bay
east bay ar stay

I am not I

That there is not me.
I die for the truth.
That there is a jerk.
I am the ominous eye.
I whisper in her universe
When she listens.

20 years

for a PhD.

Be choosy with friends

And enemies will follow.

Ma-o-ba

Shoma.

[Happy to have witnessed, in my life time, the glorious end of one of the greatest civic trans generational media spectacles in the American history.]

sobekneferuz

hatshepsut thutmuz amenemhat josephusynogea

2

Swim

Time

Fall, back
Spring, forward

I practiced democracy today

Democracy is so fragile, in a dynamic state of self-correction every second. Democracy exists when there is a void of power, no autocratic power allowed to disrupt the equilibrium. Is democracy a passive balance of action in an active soul? What?
Globalization of democracy with the self-correction in mind reminds me of solitary silent humans, drinking wine from a crystal clear glass of wine, and nothing else, saying life may not be the party we asked for, but while we are here, we should dance.
I envision humans living in cubes, pushing on its walls for a contact with reality, missing the point that reality is in their push and nothing else? A functionalist approach?
Yes, no war, no extremism, no harsh and quick decisions, but in the soul, oh, in the soul, there is war, there is terrorism, and there are hard decisions. Is the soul a story? Is human condition dynamic through history? History and story. Changing stories we tell our souls change history, and genes forget their origin eventually, they do. Tik Tak of evolutionary clocks.
Yes, I am not clear I know. They say people can be very clear when they have an understanding. Does it mean I don't know what democracy is? Can you practice democracy in a place where people are not educated enough not to exploit it? Yes, exploitation for power is contradiction to void of power in democracy. Dialogue is important. But words, words, words. Talk is cheap.
Yes, my head hurts.

Parody

The more we know, the more we don't know.
We want to be immortal, but pleasures we seek are transient.
To live, die in living, but donate your organs when you really die.

Everything rewinds

...but where exactly is the rewind button?
In the belly of a whale, called Pinocchio.

To October

An unexpected happening
A beautiful event
A rainy cold evening
A family reunion
and a blue sky
above...

Halloween

I am going to be me,
Mu ha ha ha ha ha !

The honorable lady

She lost herself
In the precise language
She won everyone
By the precise language
She chose to live her life
For the precise language
And that's all that matters?

Resolution

We all fall down in the end of all stories
Because life is a transaction
slower than a kiss but faster-
than
.
.
.
...time.

Vanilla Beans

Inhale the intoxicating aroma of wild Madagascar vanilla beans and a smooth black tea leaves blending brewed for four minutes and stop making stories.

To the gods of computer

Please make my virus go away.
I promise to be a good girl in return.

To the god of schedule

I am excited for tomorrow.

To the gods of focus

Please let me focus.

Trapezoid

I can argue. I can swear. I can fight.
I can lose when you lose.
I can not win unless you win.

Triangle

Remaining the same through change is more important than change through the same-ness.

Square

Self commitment is more important than commitment to another.

Circle

Self help is more important than helping another.

Forest Date

I was exhausted today. The few hours I slept last night was on the uncomfortable chair. I finally finished the assignment and took off early to take a bit of nap before 7pm. The sleep felt so good. I woke up by the rings of the phone which I didn't answer because it was already 7:05pm! It's so strange when someone else who has no idea what's happening at 7pm calls you up for no particular reason on their side but serves as a great help on a plane they wouldn't know on my side. Anyways, I wore my white warm coat, lit up a cigarette, and head out of house. No one was home, I guess they had left when I was sleeping. I apologized for being 10minutes late. I hope you forgave me alright because I didn't hear an answer. The strong smell of the cigarette and the bitter after taste brought my senses fully back. Walking journey to the forest was pleasant in the bearable coldness, below the grey sky, and above the fresh decolouring fall leaves. I held his hands in my pocket and walked. It was specially quiet and if it wasn't for the warm hands, I would have felt all alone. You slowed down the walk, and I suddenly realized how fast I was going. I like slow walks better as well, on days like this, but I never told you that, as if you already knew. A few droplets of tears formed in the corner of my eyes, making the front road blurry. I thought the tears can not be of sadness, they are of there because of presence, here, with you. Why are we here? What happened? What brought us here? Was it a child play? I feel the presence though, and it is breath-taking. Thanks for holding my hands. I smiled and you smiled, and I felt assured. We walked in silence on the beautiful road towards the forest. I suddenly thought of him. Maybe you read my mind, because you noticed it, and asked me what I was thinking of. I stared into his eyes in my heart, and graciously smiled by saying thank you. Do you feel offended? No, you said, as long as you tell me everything. I then held your hands stronger and said to myself, enough of this memory game, be here, and I was. I was fully there with you after. I asked you to look at the trees instead of me. They were just as pretty, if not prettier. In silence, we got to the forest. It was dark and there was no one there. I was scared to stay too long. I hugged you and listened to your heart beat. Beautiful. breath-takingly beautiful. Thanks for being here with me. Above our heads, there was a tree, yellowing in the face of season, except a few of the red leaves. I picked one to bring back home. You will get it soon. On the way back, I saw Bobby, this white little cute dog. I said hi to him and he panted back in extreme excitement, for seeing a familiar face, who knows his name. He kept jumping up and down on my legs, and not go with his owner. We played until he was tired and I left. On my way back, I thought of tomorrow and the remaining tasks. My mind was not the same as before. I am now calm and sleepy. I thank you for your time and presence. Kisses.

tri - logy

When the wind blows the rain away
on a cloudy day,
the focus of my balance slips on the shifting sands.

Does

The quality of questions
Determine
The quality of life

It is crucial that I write right now

I can't write right right now
when words are behind the clouds
of my intoxicated mind
and my tongue is burried
six feet under the soaked ground
where worms dip deeper than time
I shall write right
when my eyes turn clear
to bask in the warming sun

?

?

!

!

It was mom on the phone

This
This
This
and only this
is my
scariest
nightmare
A fear feared all my life
Reason why I want to be strong

Eye hosting

Sleep knocks
Behind the shadow of my dreams
When I open the old wooden doors
It tip-toes back to the other side of the full moon.

I am not sarcastic but...

Funny how not sarcastic I can be!

I am not arrogant but...

Funny how arrogant I can be!

I am not short but...

Funny how everyone is taller than me!

I am not old but...

Funny how students get younger
As I spend more time learning!

Green living

With great pleasure,
I declare
to have wasted a vote.
Thank you ladies,
and gentlemen,
I have inherited the genes for ruining
Destroying proteins run naturally
in my blood.
Rebel without a cause,
Cause without a rebel.

Ever talked by being mute?

-

-

What is the matter?

Gratitude

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=mj_xKA5C2vU

Ginger twist

A harmonious mix of lemongrass, tropical fruits and mint fueled with a touch of ginger and ginseng. A lush and magical infusion brewed for five minutes.

In my fragmented mind

I vote against democracy!

Pathology of a failure

Interesting.
Very interesting.
Except for the stares of that ugly guy, I am deliberately not being nice.
________________________
You know what the pathology of a failure is? love-hate duality. Find a balance. How many times should I tell you that?
_______________________
I reflected again. Full balance is possible as long as you live in a den and don't come out of it.
Is that what you say to convince yourself of some things and not others?
No, it's something that happens in my mind sometimes when I practice democracy.
I wanted you to hear.
Who, me?
No, silly.
I am happy now. The little things that make me happy!
I also crack myself up.
_______________________
Okay, I am out. Need to get a life.

Silence of song birds

They are under the breath-taking pressure of extinction. Birds are not only in the sky, they are graciously mentioned in culture, literature, poems, and other works of art. They have inspired technologists and engineers as models. Crucial for habitat maintenance, huge burden on their shoulders for food chain. Why extinction? Insecticides, pesticides, agriculture intensification, habitat loss. The concern isn't for birds, but humans just as equally. Isn't it time we cared more for the environment and were less disillusioned for believing in unlimited resources? Let's go Green.

[I am not getting paid by their party. As a matter of fact, I may lose my car because of carbon tax, but let it be.]

see>saw<

i am living a life lacking self-stability for i am not the center of the universe, but instead tilted to a region that describes who i am. fortunately the world is a teeter toter and for a split second, self-stability is a possibility.

Rainforest Mate

Soaking up the intoxicating sensations of the Amazon rainforest in a lush mate of fruit and spice brewed for five minutes. Mate is a south American herb treasured by generations for its tonic effect.

The nobel protein

Shimomura touching my life.
Side-product of a research as the discovery and turning point of a century.
I wouldn't have my first paper the way it is, if it wasn't for him.
*Due respect*

Bombay chai

A melange of spicy notes conjuring the steamy, aromatic, delights of an Indian street market. Black tea leaves with subtle hinge of orange, cinnamon, cardamom, pepper, and clove brewed for four minutes.

To someone who doesn't read me

I lived through life following my heart I recognized your stability because my heart had none you recognized my instability you took back your life I saw you take off with life my heart then took off here is to you now someone who doesn't read me

Ha-ha-ha

deserted

If you didn't have your




past




to help you remember what you did when you were where you were
would you







recognize




yourself?

I am a stranger

I have never changed my perfume, because I am afraid of..




.losing myself.

Recognition

Memories
are the



most mysterious
entities.

One day

If I stop walking
-one day-






Would you recognize me like you did before?

To Israel

No one
-with little exaggeration-
passes planet earth
without hearing a Beatles song.
Get some McCartney
As opposed to life.

When sweetness leaves me

I want to eat all the chocolate in the world.

Falling sky in fall is falling

smell of fresh drying leaves
dressed up for my salad
giving into the green grass
red orange juice of their lives
filled time with -beauty knows no limits-
smell of dried fresh leaves.

If and only if

Blindness is seeing
then and only then
Seeing is blindness

When I am blue

When I am blue
Sky's not blue
The moon is painted
-Blue-
When I am the moon
I wish to be the sun
So if I decided not to shine
I couldn't

Sun

Give me the truth
I will die for it

The Blues hit

I am the moon.

When Noush drank

She hung over the cliff edge,
Unintelligibly over the unbridgeable abyss-
Of nightmares.

eyes of glass

nihilistic seducers
are words-
every letter a king
for gods-
who kill flies
for sport.

Sacrilegious

Butterflies get sacrificed
For the sake of art
Because humans are too real
To be sacrificed.

Manual

If I am sometimes intractable
It doesn't mean that I am not tractable.

If I am sometimes silent
It doesn't mean that I am not talkative.

If I am sometimes nosy
It doesn't mean that I care.

If I am sometimes unemotional
It doesn't mean that I have no heart.

If you push the red botton
I will push the purple botton.

If you pass the green light
I will stop and ask why.

Beep. BEEP. beep.

No more "I love you's"

I want you to want to
-clean the toilette
-wash the dishes
-clean and cook
-while you vacuum

King Lear

Sleepless
In
Seattle
But
Sleepy
In
Theatre

October is here

I would have never realized
If it wasn't for October
Is here.

Thinking of a title to do justice

Ecstasy doesn't fit in my left ventricle
The right side is too weak to hold antiparticle
I try to wrap my head around the incommunicable
With the soft tissue of my tendons accessible
The spongy bone gets in the way of untouchable
Then you are left with a religion unwarrantable

Love it?

When you can blame
Things on fate
To accommodate
Before they agglomerate
To dissociate?

Eyes Wild Open

Coincidences pop
In a shockwave
Like a pan of corn seeds
In a microwave

When you can't stop laughing

Don't stop laughing.
Where does laughing come from?

I can not believe this!

I can not believe that!

A raging movie

Yes.

September is over

I thank the God of September from the deepest part of my left ventricle.

Out-.-.-.-.-.-.to

Break-
fast.
Slow-
work.
Quick-
lunch.
candle-light
dinner.
Sweet-
sleep.
In
[cage]
On
[Antibiotics].
No
[Complaints].
Horses.
-Live. Love. Light. Life-
Matches.

At the end of the day

You and I are different anyway

snoozed out

Poorly ventilated head
Waiting to emit air forcibly from a nose-
Obstructed by mucous
Waterlike morbid substance in eyes-
Blocking the rays of the sun
It is warned, but never arrives

White Cocoon

A knock
On mind's right side
Fed-Ex deliveryman
Brought me an idea
Fragile, writted on the box

Tea Time

Trim it to the
-bone-
Then talk

Hanging future

In your mind
Time as beads of pearls
Fragmen-ted

I could lay there

forever

Be one

It takes the touch of a genius
To say what you said,
But simpler.

Strike a cord

Did you hear me when I was philosophizing your absences?
I wish everything was as easy as the remaining silence
after
thunder-
-storms

I have no religion

Religion has me.

Anything

But not everything.

Yo Ga Yo Ga Yo Ga Yo Ga...You Go

When you are short of breath
Take one breath at a time

[As far as discipline goes, and not further]

Don't fall

Happy fall

I write..

..to procrastinate

[bye]

Shrink Shrunk

I know not why

Background of relatedness

Some can't understand
Some can't not understand
Some can't understand that they can't understand
Some can't understand that they can't not understand
Some try
Some don't try
Some try not to try
Some are quitters
Some are beginners
Some are beginning quitters
Some are quitting beginners
Some are funny
Some are not funny
Some try to be funny
Some try not to be funny
Some know that they don't know
Some don't know that they know
Some are funny and they don't know it
Some don't know that they don't know
Some don't know that they don't know even if they try to understand
Stop
Just be

de part

You said that
and you left

You said that
when you left

When you said that
you left

You said that
and you left

Where you said that
you left

You said that
Where you left

You said that
and you left

Did you say that?
Did you leave?
Where to?
Good.

Just a just a just note

Revenge is the pleasure of little minds, always be stronger than that
Which flower? the one on your grave or that in your garden?
How many times do you feed your mind?
Appreciation is the language of heart
A stamp sticks to an envelope until destination
Because saying no is art
Being one with the world is wise
But laugh at your stupidity every once in a while
When you kiss yourself in the mirror
If you didn't know how old you are, how old would you be?
Buddha saw death once and his whole life changed, how many have you seen? What happened to you?

Jambalaya

Keeping self exotic has costs
In the land below heavens

White elephants take over the political soapbox
and Friedrich Nietzsche goes green, I foresee

When Freud wrestled with your dad
the fight was missing alittle redness

Recycling words in black bins:
romance, recession, revolution

Barbados and rastafarians
See how the world turned?
Urban sustainability is very conservative

I have some sort of inferiority complex
You have to be almost perfect with me

How do you take your coffee?
With cheese please

I liked to write until I read the masters
Then I realized all songs have a broken bone

I sometimes crack me up

Hahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahaha

If I don't come back by 3...

Publish them in 3 classified sections.

[..goodbye delicious world, kill me softly, with bittersweet kisses..]

New York Trip as the end of me

___________________________________

Light and sound

Human, huwoman
chimps and champs
Snakes and ethics
Go hand in hand

TSB

tsb

Life as Journey to Home

Back home
From home
Full of lessons
Destination unknown
Soaring soul
With journey itself
As home

Technoformation

ItiswithgreatpleasuretoannouncemyselfresignedbrainshavebeenblownawaybythemassivegiantsIamfindingmywaythroughamassofinformationIwillthereforestopfingeringmybrainfornewimagesIpromisetostopbangingonthefourwallssurroundingthecupboardsofclosetsofmybrainandnotcreateawholenewmessofworldsbywordsbecauseifyoulookdeepenougheverythingisalreadyonthetable

On Champ de Mars

I was only passing by in spring
when the woods were green
Highly organized structural edifice
Great reflection of beauty and magnificence
Extremely soft and fragile on the inside
Hard as a rock but weigh less than air

We are all equal
Despite our puzzling appearances
Some are equal-er on different wavelengths
Except the exploiters
With their peculiar attachments

Dogs in the coffee and mice in the tea
With a smooth whipped-cream
A blue sock in the left foot
A yellow sock in the right
On a road less travelled by

If someone spoke in the face of disagreement
Suicide could be prevented, out of alcatraz lives
Several forms of personal, academic kind

Method in madness of the madmen
Perhaps I will understand in summer
When everything is nothing out of way
When the days are long, a la rivière Sein
alittle bit of magic.

Wait, did I make sense?
..no..no..no..no..
Let me start over



















.

Tell me a lie

and I am gone forever, into thin air.

September 11th

Happy
Today

When seeing is not believing

I was healing by the green tea
When the dirty fingers came again
this time manicured, with red nailpolish.
Devoid of words, but strong smell of dried acetone.
They diagnosed me with a voluntary blindness
just because I wear my sunglasses at night.
I told them gravity picks you up when you fall
and time heals by destroying your memory.
When you talk you speak for me
and I speak for you when I talk.
I insisted on fiction being fact because dreams come true
They said come back when you're not blind kid.
Seeing is not believing you see?
[Fingers never see, they always point.]

Dull moments

We hung the death coat on tomorrow's shelf
to recycle today's thoughts on our chewing gums
and keep them in jars for yesterday's darkness.

[Back to a tight schedule]

Do not get in the way.

Holy Moly Guacamole

Ever laughed your laughs off?
Ever laughed your cries off?
Ever missed something so badly
That even reaching it wouldn't be enough?
Ever gotten washed away with the ocean waves
And never came back?
Ever seen an orange bird in heaven
When there was only a black crow on a garbage bag?
Ever not given due time to time?

Riding Down the Red Road

Like a cherry between the crusts of an apple pie
We all owe a timely death to god
Not my dog

An image captured my eyes

I want a good camera

Something happened

I was waiting for it for three months
I was feeling the time in my veins
As it got closer to the day, the veins signalled stronger
I could hear the tick tocks off my hand watch
A mixed feeling of anxiousness and desire, inquiry and curiosity
I was extatic on the last day
What will happen?
Will we finally meet?
At 5:55, something happened.
I didn't go.

Dad

Smokes my life...
away.

Le pure cafe

A home at the end of the world
You are a collection of events that happened in your past
Disturbing to be part of someone else's memory
Memories taking part in reality
How are you doing? Great
You? Great
Am I the only one who finds this funny?
Gloomy town but my brain was clear
Free from consuming frenzy
They enjoy the goal not the process
No ambition to be a leader
Memories are wonderful things if you don't have to deal with the past
What is lost is lost
But what is lost is irreplaceable
It hurts
Need to dissolve the barriers of self
Little details you miss and can't replace
The way the sun was shining
I missed it
Where were you?
Do you have a soul mate?
Someone who attacks you and is alive?
Mind is a machine
My brain is going to be worth 50 thousand dollars, how cheap
You think there are many people you can connect with when you are young
You realize the many times only happen very few times when you are old
Didn't you become greedy at any point?
We are on a train and it goes on and on and on and on and on and on and on...
Find a balance. Give me a break.

Mandala

Something long was written
It was not published
What is written gets lost in you
Through your kaleidoscopes
Interpretations kill
You judge when you think,
and judge just as much when you don't think
Your version of stories kill my version
Something very long was written
It was not published.

.../\...\/...

...\/.../\...

From end of the world's end.

Suicide is homicide.
Homicide, a partial suicide.
Faces framed, on walls, of fame.

11228467

98675867
00130400
55555555
98989898
________

Timbuktu

We spent thirteen years in Timbuktu
Watching the sun set impromptu
Listening to bells tolling for whom..
Silence hiding hind the trees
Us running barefoot in forest with ease
Filling our lungs with ocean breeze
Running like quasars catching geese
Shading our only lonely needs
We didn't want to die alone
In indifferent echoes of our own

Converscore

Hollow game, language named
Ping pong balls, lightweight befalls
Behind the baseline, stingy timeline
Words get served, once or twice
Hit your half of table, first
Hitting the net, opponent's ahead
Serve it well, good returns
Dance in play, think no way
Server's move is..your endplay

It is no accident that we met

There was once a time that we knew each other

A Glimpse

When I come out of the flesh
I look at the past
at the present
and see the future.
I then wonder,
Is it really worth living it all, at all?
Or would you rather change it all?
A voice then tells me from beyond
Take it one breath at a time
It is only then that it will take a life-time.

Ga2(au).2

chocolat

Time

Flies.


[..August was good. September is gooder. Leave October to October..]

This is not a title

and this is not a text.

[You are not reading this. You haven't had dinner yet but you are having dessert. A hot creme brule with a fresh brewed coffee. If you think you're perfectly sane, it's merely a thought.]

I know you don't read this

I have not been at my best.

My dog

never laughs.

when they laughed,

they left us alone.

when we laughed,

they were being jelous

when you laughed,

you were not hiding anything.

when I laughed,

I was hiding my fears

Stir

your e
mo
tion
no
love
no
evol
u
tion

dOg Z eAt dOg Z wOrLd Z

(prisons are sometimes sounder and safer)

A tinge of peach

Days are jingled
when nights are jangled

When days are tingled
Nights are tangled

Make days mingled
so nights are mangled

And a quack quack bangle
with a moo moo angle

Days of isolation

...I like this familiar smell. It used to be a washroom before they equipped it with a million dollar baby. There is no ventilation between the concrete walls. They don't bring me food, nor water either. I used to be good when I was outside. I don't know why they turned me in. They say they want to teach me how to deal with all those junks out there. They want me to think for myself not for others. They say I need to learn how to deal with too much goodness. I like the smell, so I don't mind staying for a while. I am trying to think now but these mind waves distract me. They don't let me think hard enough to find things out. I have to find out how to deal with the junks out there. Yes, that's exactly it. I have to think. Smells like old buildings. This room has a character I tell you. The character of a prison. Will they bring me food?...

Ever had a race with time?

I will catch up with you later!

High-way

When longing is short-lived
Temptation is long-lived
You then wonder if you're high
Or if the way is too long for a short-cut

Fun

is
Enough

Tick

is
Tock

Tragedy

is
Comedy

Malady

When bored of self, change your clothes
Like a hungry snake preying on a crocodile
Or a naked emperor preying on attention
Ask the sun to cover the moons with clouds

K-us

When organization
Lacks
Mind
Goes astray
In
Chaos
Language
Subdues culture
Being
Loses sight
And organization
Lacks

First Aid

Cutting hands to take gold bracelets
Fighting over who gets the wallets
Displacing the rocks to rescue jewelry not people
Money makes the world go...rounder...

LadyBug

A lady bug landed on my bare arm's skin when I was walking my walk. I am merely talking my walk now, but let me tell you this. That walk has occupied my mind eversince morning. What did she want to tell me? I fell in love with its beautiful sense of fashion, wearing red and black wings, like the devil, personifying an angel with a message.

[..thanks for giving me my dose of love today..]

Cry

About nothing in particular.
Intensely though.
It's sunny out.
Will it rain?

Chekhov's Lady, with a lapdog

When self pleasure raises above pledged commitments
the secret life pleasures take over the authentic
and the real colors get tainted by those imagined
so much so that the authentic arouses no curiosity
and the imagined becomes more real.

You then wonder if you really want the real back
or
would you rather acknowledge the fading memories
or
embrace the unreal altogether and above all?

Choice is yours. Please. Help yourself. But don't regret. Please. Ever been disappointed with endings? When does an ending end and a beginning begin?

[..craving for peace and beauty perpetuates our movements towards unity, regardless. So, why so serious son?..]

Incurable

Romantic bend of mind clouds my eyes sometimes.

[..must be the damned love wine they injected into my veins like heroine powder when I was delivered from the fairyland..]

Too late too soon

the world is a different place
when you sleep on the edge for two hours
before the coffee smell wakes you up
to a pretty mess of organized papers
showered with good day wish notes and midnight kisses
and the sky's blazing darkness through the full moon
makes you realize that you didn't wake up
to the coffee smell
but to the full moon of blank pages
running through your veins

Humanimalism

Man wore a mask
to cover the wild animal
gone insane
within
the skin of a sheep
feasting over prays
of other wild animals
gone insane
within
the skin of a sheep
Woman wore a mask

Give me a B

A
R
R
K
S
H
S
A
R
P
M
C
A
H
J
A
L
A
S
V
T


[to the god of...alphabets...]

réception

le temps soleil brille
Je s'allonger
dénuement s'épanouir sous le soleil
de mon corps

De. ja. vu.

Someone asked me today... 'is your name Emily?'
I only smiled back in shock...
We...parted...in silence...

[...To three months of my life...]

Self-less-ness

Ever looked into the eyes of another so deep so you could think all his thoughts, feel all his emotions, and perceive all his perceptions and the way he playfully embodies these three into a fleshly package?
I can do that sometimes with some people of some kind. It scares me to death. It is also the most beautiful thing I will ever be able to see with my eyes before I die. What I see is their self-less-ness unmasked through a mirroring magical play.

Security in Insecurity

The world revolves around insecurities, and the way we deal with insecurities: we hide them, oppose them, supress them, give in to them, abuse them, or hold it against one another.
If it could revolve around love one day, people would deal with their insecurities by just letting them be.
That world is my dream.
Let's start with self first.

Nothing remains in eternit..y

when words are tiring
even silence doesn't say it enough
take me to a show
in which I can watch you disappear
in the streams of moonlight
to hide a fleeting ghost
and rest in the midst of a smoky stage
among the mona lisa strangeness
of the sacred smiles
of disappearing silhouettes
before the eternity of my eyes
..Je vais aller dormir

A viewpoint of deep time in the land of imagery

My blog on a wooden chair
Sent by a friend

How's death?

Beautifully devastating.

How's life?

Devastatingly Beautiful.

Maxim Gorky

I would chose intelligent writing if I was stuck between personal honesty and sincere support of the regime. Writers are engineers of the human soul, afterall, although not all.

Wisdom recipe

Secrets are not secrets when they are told anymore.
Telling your secrets strips you naked but destroys your barriers.
Once you tell your secrets, find new ones.
Do this process as many times as you can, until you explode.

My secrets!

I am silent when you leave me
I cry when you hurt me
I am beautiful when you love me
I go weak in the knees when you don't leave me
My eyes glitter when you protect me
My head feels light when you whisper to me
My heart dances waltz when you stay with me
My body desires your wrapped arms around me
My soul needs to belong to you more than my body needs sleep, food or air.

[...and she faints after these words are uttered...this is her secretary...]

Rhythms

répéter 10 fois,
toutes les 10 minutes,
pour une journée.

The games we play...

Thank you ladies and gentlemen.
I am not falling in traps.
I have got a prison of my own.
Thank you very much.

08.08.08

Synchronicity is my favorite game in the universe

Perpetuation

Something in the repeats make them not the same, like three writings of the same thing. Like cursing at the annoying tone of the phone when it rings at 7 in the morning and hearing a sleepy faint voice from the other end saying "rain rain rain, it's raining today". Like meeting the familiar eyes of a stranger's face when time and space change all the time [and space]. The earth's position changes. Your cells wouldn't be the same. One osteoblast dies when one osteoclast is born. But you repeat the same tasks over. What are in these repeats? What would you do otherwise if you ever could? Me? I wouldn't change anything. Is the unknown better than the known? You will not die until you evolve in your repeats, I know that. I dreamt about it last night when two flying sharks were pointing towards my unprotected body tied down to a piece of wood in the middle of an angry ocean. The dream must have been rooting from my anger at myself for being so smoky with someone and feeling helpless as to how to speak so she can understand my words aren't harsh but what needs to be done needs to be done. Are you a stranger when things are strange? Is this snake feeling any different by being on the left side of the cage compared to yesterday when it was on the right side? I sang for the snake today and it listened to my voice very attentively by bringing its head up the cage. How can a snake with no ears listen to my vocal vibrations when she can't listen to me with her ears? The answer is, no one listens. No one listens without their barriers and filters in listening. I grant you and me that and only that. If I were the god of evolution, I would give humans half a mouth, four eyes and four ears. My heart-beats today are not the same as yesterday. Must be the ocean's waves in my dream last night. Ever been a stranger to your heart?

Magnifique

Aurais-je obtenu de matières grasses si j'avais mangé toute la beauté que je vois devant mes yeux?
Oui Oui, tu exploses

Magnifique

Aurais-je obtenu de matières grasses si j'ai mangé toute la beauté que je vois devant mes yeux?
Oui Oui, tu exploses

Magnifique

Aurais-je obtenir de matières grasses si j'ai mangé toute la beauté que je vois devant mes yeux?
Oui Oui, vous exploser

DeMoKraTiK TiK TiK TiK

Oba-Ma-Ton-Clin
PuPpeTs DaNcE fOr PuPpeTeErS
CoLoR dOeS nOt MatTeR iF yOu ArE a PuPpEt
NoT gEnDeR eItHeR
MoNeY AnD pOwEr SpIcEd WiTh PoLiCiEs
nO wAr fOr PeAcE sLoGaN
Oba-Ma-Ton-Clin

To you, for me

.


[Somethings I say...sometimes...when you're not there
and...sometimes...somethings I say...when you're there]

Title

I don't want to write today.
Just want to leave this page blank.
No communication.
Only silence.
Don't read these today.
Read them
yesterday.

Simulacra

The war in Vietnam never happened. It was only on TV, Baudrillard said.
The only difference between suicide and murder is press coverage.

[You connect the logics if you catch my drift. Thank you.]

Magnetism

When Sun's magnetic activity is at its maximum
On August 1st 2019
I have a date in Kuujjuaq

My Saudi billionaire husband who made a fortune by selling camels, and my tribe of children can not join me

Your French wife who doesn't let you go on dates alone and kids begging you to go camel riding can not join you

Just two magnets in Kuujjuaq
On August 1st 2019
When Sun's magnetic activity is at its maximum

Smoke

How can I manage my emotions better so when I tell my dad to take a break from his work for a week I wouldn't cry? I made his eyes smoky. Or when this other tells me they still haven't finished the work I wanted done the day before, smoke doesn't come out of my ears? Where does smoke come from?

Eighth Art

Eighth art has been haunting me lately. I am anxious by it. Like how our fathers used to feel nostalgic about their past and how good it used to be. Like hearing how things felt closer to the heart by my dad. How warm feelings were. How you could touch the dirt and make yourself dirty. And all of a sudden, a turn in the directions. Technology hits. Everything is still warm. Not by heart, but by motor engines. The skins I touch are mostly electridied. And now the eighth art. Low and behold! The video games! A special interaction. Doesn't feel like the old cold electrified computer skins anymore but it's not as warm as dirt. There are other user interfaces, equipped with visual and sound feedbacks. Fully responsive and the hassle of going through dark mental games of humans is no problem any more. You play what you want and get what you desire and leave when you wish. In a hundred years from now, love is illegal in your heart. Remote controls here and there for all your dark and light wishes and desires baby. Welcome to the space age. It started when we were dreaming of the moon. Another home. When we wanted to grow a rose on the moon so we could see it grow big from earth. Sputnik was launched from the USSR in 1958. It's gone far ever since. Astrobiology. Agriculture of space. Life in extreme environments. What's in stores next? Policy making for space colonization. This world is not my home anymore. Not my dad's either.
Welcome to the future baby. Love baby. Touch baby. Before everything is illegal. Make it better baby. I couldn't.

Muse

Once upon a time, long long ago, in a far away land, there was Music. Music delivered me one day. I have been musically in love ever since.

Murmur

My heart
was pulled and ripped
out of its cage
vessels torn
blood gushing out
My heart
was hit and smashed and crushed
before my eyes
My heart
is still pumping
Will you write
My heart
a eulogy before it stops?

Dimensions

The way you see the world is one way
And
Not
The
Only.
Show me yours, and I will not show you mine.
My
Way
Is
The
Highway.
If I show you mine, don't show me yours.
Unless...we're in the same dimension.

Sleep perchance to dream

I shall sleep tonight.
After two sleepless nights.

Summerlicious

Eclectic tastes of many creamy sensualities on my tongue.
Prays for the tastes not to disappear into the unknown dark pathway of my stomach.
Bravo to the chefs.
Bravo to my tongue.
Bravo to my companions.
And your humbleness is never out of sight.

Ne veut pas partir....

alors tu aurais du rester....

ArrowGun

Unity creates spirit. Spirit creates solidarity. Solidarity creates unity. All we ever want. All we can ever ask for. Man is created for his service to man. That is all there is to it. Why so serious son?

Joker

Living in the world of batmans and jokers. Fun to be around.

Wall-E

E-Wall
Full circle. Completion. Love. Life. Earth. Water. Green plants. Fire. Art. Holding hands. Warmth. Cuteness. Myth.

Astrobiology of Quantum theory

Time. There is no beginning and no ending. There is no definition either. It goes faster than you can ever imagine at the atomic level. You are so insignificant in front of it. Why so serious? Jump up and down like your inner electrons when they see a proton. Live it up high.

COSPAR - day 1

So much fucking laughs for two days. Look at my fucking face now. Flipped around. So fucking mad. Forgot to send the abstract for their booklet. Will leave the this place a day earlier. Freaked out city with all these fucked up engineers and physicists. So fucking wiered. Handsome and fucking sexy though. Cold now. Sick now. Fucking feet fucking hurt from every fucking angle. Freaking booklet is so thick and heavy to carry around. Fucked up shoulders hurt. All the body hurts now. Consequence of all those loud laughs earlier. Good fucking night.

Poverty

Poverty is a disease. His disease was corrupting me until I found out the roots and deplanted his psychological games from my mind. He still has part of me, the part that's whithered away and frozen in air behind my head. I didn't want to be drained and diseased. The connection was haunting though, don't ever underestimate that. The power of words, the lingering memories, the mystical poetic texture of movements. I believe these were mutually felt by both of us, but then the parasites hit. I have affairs now, every now and then, with myself. I listen very carefully, to myself, until I am plagued again with another radiation-ridden, cell killing, limb-deteriorating diseased man, until I am deceased.

A memory

A rant.
A monologue.
A prayer.
Wasn't there.

Decoding Epic in a Red Letter

Which story shall I tell? From the beginning of my time, all my stories have remained the same. I have had many journeys to the unknown to explore all the plots but I come back to the same formats. Will things change if I leave the oral realm of telling my stories and dive into the physical realm to experience them? I don't think so. I keep living the same stories so I might as well just tell them instead. But then again, every story has been told before and there are no stories I could ever tell you that you have not heard. I have my versions like everyone else. I can tell you the story of my tragic love, my comic appearances, my fights with the internal and external monsters, my voyages and my returns, my quests to the unknown from rags to the riches, and my rebirths. You will muse, laugh, cry, and experience every story that ever existed. Give me your ears.

Magical Mystery

Horse whale juxtaposition. Whiskered walrus. Hands to recognize shapes. Two plus a hundred. Splashing water. Deep underneath the surface. Feed Little fish. Prominent. Tusks. Submerged. Flippers. Blubbers. Largest mammal ever lived. Blue. Predators. Conscious breathers. One hemisphere of brain sleeping at a time. Can afford sleep with one eye closed. Sonar interference bring stranding. Pinocchio adventures. Divinity. Symbol of metaphysical allegory. Monster of the deep. Clapping Circus. Playful attitudes. Friendly appearance. Streamlined. Acute senses. The superiors. Vocalized communication. Cultural behaviors. Aggressions. Companion competition. Play. Therapeutic. In love.

This beautiful city

.

What he does to me I can not put in words

He assures me that I am not here alone. He doesn't tell me what he wants, neither do I. He touches my soul in the right place. His mind games are not worth leaving him all together. He plays mind games with me and I go away but deep in my soul, I would understand why he does what he does.

Explosion

As if he was anticipating me from way back with an assertiveness I found new in him. I have been languid to the point of impracticality lately. He had lost so much weight. I trembled in his sure embrace. [TSB]

Coffin

Is there such thing as coincidence? Is it an accident that we know each other?
There was once a time I had somebody.
It's not true what they say about waking up.
The dream you had, now has part of you.
There was once a time when I had somebody. There was once a time.
Can you tell there's something I am not telling you?
I can tell by the sound of your voice that there is something you're not telling me too.
Are you there?
I can not leave messages. Will you pick the messages up from the wind next time? Will you?
Don't you know there is no such thing as accident?
There was once a time, once a time, when I had somebody.

Tea Pot in Tea Dot

How can I kill him not in physical reality but in the reality of my mind and then have no guilt thereafter? I mean you know how these criminals get devastated for life because they have taken the life of someone and so become suicidal for the rest of their lives? Should I get a prescription for doctor for deletion of memory? Maybe I should talk to a computer tech junkie instead or a professional software developer for memory deletion? I will ask the police or a court lawyer for their opinions on whether killing one and saving a thousand is better than not killing and killing. What? No, wipe this out of your mind, are you out of your mind? Okay, deep breathe. Deep breathe. Now. Have fun. Live it up high. Okay, that was easy. Bye now.

ForeFathers

Black coals turn gray with fire
Black hair turn gray with age
Ashes to ashes
wind to wind
soil to soil
Where do I go?
Water to water

To the ace of my heart

Ever whirling carousel twirling in a hollow space like a harmonic mystery
My only lonely wheel spinning around the fortune wheel in my silent dreamland
My madness in defeated love clashing his invincible reason in madness
Steamy summer storms snowballing down the steep hill of insanity
Running rings around the fingers of your forgotten hands
My love for you is a withering rose meandering in the wind

Microscopy course

Two Practicums done. Two left to do. A seminar presentation. A written essay. A final exam. All pending. Learnt alot but not enough yet. Can't wait till it's over.

Teaching assistantship

Lots of papers to mark. Due tomorrow. I am tired. Don't like the whole thing all too much. Need a break. Will be done by the end of July. Can't wait.

IODA Project

Under pressure before it arrives home. Deadlines. Mixed feeling of nervousness and excitation. It's great I am co-supervising others to help me do it all. Long-term outcome so requiring extreme intrinsic motivation.

Feelings

A stimulation that could fire me to the sky and pull me into the ground does not make a difference to me anymore. They say too much will kill you at the end, I think am dead already. I died long time ago.
But all of my life I will have feelings!

Real Mount

I was feeling used because I could've easily flew. That way, I would leave and arrive at a reasonable time. It was my own choice though. Why do I chose to suffer before my eyes? It was pretty dark and I was feeling the coldness in my bones, wishing for a jacket from the hands of a stranger sitting beside me. Once the bus came, I walked to the very back and sat beside a guy whose face I could not see. He said something to me but I just nodded without really hearing him. I didn't want to be nice and so keep on with a conversation for seven hours. That's when my Ipod come handy. I blast a music and pretend I am shut down from the world of realities just so I can avoid pointless conversations with a stranger on the bus. It was really dark inside. I fell asleep shortly after the bus started moving and forgot to text him the new time of my arrival. He had been waiting there, standing, for two hours before my arrival because of my forgetfulness. He was so nice to me. We walked in the streets towards the hotel in the quiet night. I had a hot tea and crashed on the bed for the two hours that I had. I could hear sharp clicks of his mouse throughout though. I don't know if I was really sleeping but when I woke up and took a shower I was feeling better. The breakfast was phenomenal, fresh and rich and creamy and hot and welcoming. We then said bye. The meeting made me more motivated to get things done. I called him once at night and we hanged out at a theater after-party smoking our lives away. The music was good. There were a couple of lights on the ground where many butterflies had gathered, spending three seconds in the light and three seconds outside the sphere. From Hawaii to Alaska in a sip of red wine. The night had a whirl of enigma. I felt like a sorcerer in the crowd, dancing my way though the actors, who can both dance and act at the same time. Actors have the power of speech and silence, but dancers have no power other than their movement. Our conversation was alluring. I couldn't help but open my mind to new ways of seeing. We walked back to the hotel humming some songs that linger in brain awhile after their presence. I was worried for my day on the spot, so got locked up in the bathroom. He got me out. What if he wasn't there and I died in the bathroom before I could appear on the stage? I am sure I would've gone to heaven if I had died. No one was waiting for me outside anyways, well, maybe except for a dozen. He saved me again. Why does he do that? He said I tossed and turned many times throughout the night. It must have been my nervousness. He woke me up and left himself. The big day arrived. My heart was pumping too much blood to my vocal cord and made my voice shake with every beat. The audience laughed at me or my presentation twice. That was a good sign. I enjoyed the dinner with live a cello and piano duo. Everyone was there. I felt awkward schmoozing but gave myself the comfort of thinking everyone else hated schmoozing as much as I did so there was no point to be sulky about it. Met him at the fashion show and formula car racing. I won an award. Ate. Home. Sweet. Home.

My Tiff with Mr. TSB

The middle east was at war with Canada today.
Feels bad? good? I feel neutral!
Debate. We have a strong responsibility for dialogue.
Censorship is not the way.

Science and Philosophy

Highest sense of relating to reality as reality.
Quantom mechanics poses a challenge to realism. Light having two properties of wave and particle at the same time. Two sides of coin positive. Skepticism grows as a result though. Lack of trust to one thing.
Skepticism, so surprised by the kindness of strangers.
Post modernism looks at history as just a narrative, a story like others, opinions of others without much sense of objectivity.
Moderate realism supports beings at a smoother level, feels fluffier and better.
Like laurence of Arabia, go for the glory not the money.
Goats are neat because they're great weed eaters.

No one

No one is here, and no one ever was. Am I talking to myself? When everyone is out to lunch, I go out for desert. It was a cosy dark corner. I sat by the wooden framed window.He brought me red wine with a tinge of tannen. I could smell the citrus before tasting it. The noise in my head was music to my ears. He was staring at me, he was. No one is here, and no one ever was.

His tannen in my dreams

It was cold. I must have slept the whole day. I slept when there was light in the sky but when I woke up there was still light. Did it ever get dark? I must have been dreaming my many dreams. I am not fully certain if I am awake now. There was a point I realized that I must be awake because everything seemed so real. He was there. We were having red wine in a cosy dark corner of a 70's restaurant. We were talking about the tannen in the wine and how wonderful it would be if we could add tannen to our blood so we preserve ourselves in the face of aging. These talks always amuse me and he knows it. That's why he brings up these silly yet smart topics during our wine sessions. Is he going to go home after? I love him selfishly. I don't want the dream to end. Leave me alone, let me sleep. Did it ever get dark when I was sleeping or was I sleeping in darkness? I want to remain in the dark oblivion. Rain woke me up. Subtle sounds of water droplets dripping and welcoming me to the world of reality. Ain't I still dreaming?

Galley Proof

Fit to Govern

Ameno

Blasphemy!
Shame!
Obscenity!
Theological Harassment!
Very bad! and Very good!
Guilt!
Laughter!
Sin!
Suicide!
Homicide!
Life!
Death!
Where is the love?

Bella Bella

Beauty crushed with age. Smoldering passions. Burning desires of love. Political bodies. Fire weeds. What's a girl to do?

Lost

He doesn't understand me. I think I speak the language of snakes.

Feasty

We were all there. Everyone ordered their favourite food. I was the center of attention. They all tried to get to know me better by reading my piece of writing and asking me questions about it. Someone even tried editing the piece. Someone gave me a beautiful bouquet of flower. I paid for the table after everyone finished eating. We head back and the attention was gone off of me. I was a normal person again. I felt peaceful.

Windsor

Hours.Trees.Colors.Lake.Tower.Hilton.Ashok.Mom.Dad.Warehouse.Shelves.Boxes.Dog.Man.Lebanon.Falafel.Ducks.Eagles.Tunnel.Detroit.Snaky roads.Clown shoes.Macy's.Sleep.Speed.Police.Fast food.Home.Again.

Mr. TSB

I miss you!

Mommy

Delicious gobble gobble, greasy potatoes, Curley shivering, Wet hair, psychological being, sleepy, Mother's Day, under pressure, deadlines approaching, I need to go.

Eros

Primordial god of love, lust, and sexuality calls for a hand in an impossible dramatic connection, never-reaching equilibrium, and the dangers of having both things. Lie with me and I will save you if you save me. Leave me alone and I will kill you too, like a mocking bird, who sang its heart before a lawyer who was once a child. Primordial god of love.

Festiwine

Swirled to aerate sparkling, deep red oak, earthly, one dimensional frizz, fresh coconut, riped goose-berries, mossy cheese, sweet on the tip of tongue, limy citrus on the corners, gargled and swallowed down. Newer white is better, but red is better old.

Focus

F O C U S
O X X X U
C X O X C
U X X X O
S U C O F

Motherland Iran

Mother has an illness of 6000 years
Father is ruling the family
Sons are sleeping
Daughters are sleepless
Family is unidentified
Mother has a terminal disease
Not illness from outside germs
Growing tumor cells from inside
Who does what when and where now?

Puppet

Weaving with everlasting colored threads
Improvising on an elaborate motif structure perpetually
Poets are carpet weavers in dream of a poetic paradise in the form of patterns

Myth of Tibet

Gossip has it that religion is having a close relationship with exploitation nowadays. Friendly feudalism was in love with spiritual secularity but along the way bumped into feudal theocracy, had an affair and ended its relationship with the first love. They say first cut is the deepest. Let it be?

Love

Do

Global warming

Is it true that the larger the seas get, the smaller our wishes and dreams become?

Delete

Deleted everyone from my cellphone and messenger list to see if they get deleted from my mind. Time is the healer. I will wait and see.

Laboratory Life

Saturday afternoon. It was raining like cats and dogs. Ran off from the car to get to the nearest entrance door. I was soaked when I got in. Turned on the computer right away and started culturing cells. I was in the mood for Chopin music. No one was there. Turned it on loud while doing work. Bone cells have a serene culture you know. I started the bacteria culture. Bacteria have a smelly culture you know. I ran up and down the stairs to get to necessary equipment. I didn't forget to look out the window once in a while. It turned hazy and foggy, but the rain had stopped. I wish I could go out for a smoke but the culture needed me here. Time passed for a while until I remembered that I should look out the window. The sun was going down. The sky had a foggy red and orange shadow. I wish I was out there walking between those trees with my dog but the culture still needed me. It is dark now. Pitch black, and I am going home to sleep.

Three sums

How do you say goodbye to someone you have can never say goodbye? and how do you say hello to someone who looks into your soul but never says hello? and then again, how do you say stay but away to someone who should stay away?

Merry

May

Celebration of a life

Death. I will never know him. I will never know what his dreams were, or his morale. All I will know of him is his family, friends, and colleagues remembrance notes of him. He will be known through the legacy he left behind.

Table Tennis

I am a ping-pong ball, a lightweight white hollow ball. There are two players who send me back and forth to each other with their rackets on a hard table over a short knitted net. This never-ending game could only stop if either of the players on either side of the table misses to bounce me back. I could become a dead ball if I don’t land on the opponent’s end line of the table. The game is fast. The reactions are quick. The eyes are gazed at me. The hands motions are my only guides. If I am not stopped by the hands, I am dead and the game is over. The game is all I have, you see. I need your undivided focus and hand-eye coordination for my survival. Game over means staying in a dark box filled with other ping-pong balls and little room to breathe. Watching my peer dead balls and hearing their death stories is depressingl mind-racking. I turn into a pessimistic creature with no ambition of success stories that may be brought about by tomorrows. I need to be gazed at and I need to be stopped by your hand motions to thrive into heights of happiness, because my ide mind in a dark box with other corpses is the house of devil. Take me with you into the game.

Sizzles

Radiating pain through my extremities
Serious enough to put an elephant down
Hand movements massaging my back
My soothing remedy is a warm touch

Massage

Soft. Gushing blood. Good.

Lake Sure

Chilly. Drew the blanket higher to cover my neck. Could hear the drip-drops of rain falling; theme music of my dream. Outside is dark. The drapes were moving with the wind. Chilly. I wasn't asleep. But I distinctly remember that I was dreaming of the water waves on the other side of the window. They looked so real, as if I was just looking out the window. The wind was making waves. Outside is pitch black. I wasn't dreaming. But I distinctly remember that my eyes were closed. He woke up to the alarm tone , playing Mozart. I cursed the music in my dream. Why did I have to wake up when he did? I wanted to continue looking at the water waves, washing over me, advancing to my neck. I woke up to the alarm tone. Coffee grains smell so good when the sky is still dark. He made a full pot. Still chilly. The warmth of the coffee penetrated my bones. Loud TV volume made my eyes wide open, CNN was covering how politics decides for science and not the other way around. Sad sad world. Drank the black coffee with all my muscles. Time to go and do my science experiments. For the government? Well, that's certainly were the money to do it all comes from. Sad sad world. So we will watch the rest next week, okay? Can't wait. Give me a hug. Bye now.

Missing my sparrow

Sorrow
Tomorrow
Found in your arms
Tomorrow
Sorrow
Lost in your arms
Tomorow
Sorrow
Longing in your arms
Sorrow
Tomorrow
Missing being in your arms
Tomorrow
Sorrow
Hold me in your arms
Sorrow
Tomorrow
Don't let go of your arms
Tomorrow
Sorrow
Let me stay in your arms
Sorrow
Tomorrow
I will cut your arms
Tomorrow
Sorrow
All I want is your cut arms
Sorrow
Tomorrow
You will go away
Tomorrow
Sorrow
I will go away
Tomorrow
Sorrow
Sorrow
Sorrow
Sparrow
My Sparrow

Smoke

Spread in my veins so that after half an hour, I could feel it in my feet and my brain simultaneously. My headache didn't let me walk. The music was soothing my ears, pampering my body. All I wanted to do was to smoke and let the music carry me away, to a far away land in which all I could do is to listen to music and get carried away to a far away land.

Being a voice

Some voices are weak but strong. Some have excuses instead of voices. Some can't make up their voice. Some voices are passionate. Some are painful. Some voice what they see. Some voice what they hear. No shows make voices disappear.
Be a voice.

Some people are ducks

And a quack quack here
And a quack quack there
And then a quack here and a quack there
And a quack quack everywhere
Everywhere a quack quack

Searching For Ever?

Stop it.
I am right here.

The Dead End Road

The end is dead. The road is deadened. Dead is the end.
Take the short cut.

Vampire

Veins. Vaccinated with a single-shot of minced brains mixed with boiled meat juice every morning before eyes are opened to the other side. Rest of the day is run by the blood running through bloody veins. Minced brain. Deep breathe. Open eyes. Closed ears.What I see is what I was is what I am is what I become is what I suck. Vampire. Blood. Veins.

Happy Earth Day

Rise and Fall of civilizations is very natural. Earth's mass does not change even if births are greater than deaths because the 'lovely lively' kill off the 'lovely other lively' to make space to live. Killing forests, animals, birds. We are all part of one though, a hemisphere. So all this green peace talk is very pessimistic, threatening, and serve in nothing but leaving us helpless as opposed to showing us a way. Global warming has a ripple effect, but don't be scared because our filthy human births and deaths doesn't really matter. As a matter of fact medieval warming gave rise to an increased life expectancy from 28 to 50 years because growth and harvest increased due to better weather for the crops, sublime and magnificent cathedrals were built because growth was associated with the Almighty. But think about it, the God was that crop that increased satiety and decreased famine in this case. All creatures, doesn't matter the kinds, are all part of this ecosystem. Biodiversity matters. Earth is a box. We are stuck here, accept it or not. If earth was a mother, it wouldn't really care about its sea levels rising. It is us who care about our houses going under water. But this is wise because not just houses, but everything goes under water. We need change in human thinking, to be able to build a city on the water with all the things we love. For this we need underground thinkers, visionaries, politicians, sociologists, and the whole jazz to be able to handle change and transform it for better survival of biodiversity.

Darwin baby! YEAH

Out to...

Lunch, under the sky's nervous system

Heavy-Days

Lost touch. Filled with a heavy load of silence. I ask for it to feed up my need for solitude and freedom but get caught up in it's languid dreams every time. Ready world? Here I come. Wait a minute, I fell off my shoulders on the way to here, must have been the heavy food I had last night. Be right back.

Heart over Intellect

Heart beats until morale improves to perfection.

Trip

I re-read my posts. I realize it is time for me to go on a vacation.

A Jingle In Jungle

Got it. Feels good. Could. Didn't. Would only make it better. Always something in the repetitions to make it not the same. Fun of it all. Second one is better. Better inside. Wasn't easy. Pleasurable start. Not a warm welcome. Warmness is in you. Mixed feelings when looking back. Idea could be brighter. Wasn't. Time spent living outside of it all. Him. Finding my own way. Big discovery in journal of my dreams, No. Biggest breakthrough in human's knowledge, No. Drug that would prevent it all, so Mommy wouldn't be in pain when she gets up, No. Nobel prize, No. Dreaming bigger than self. Idealism. To be taken everyday before sleep. A handful of reality with a grain of salt. Nevertheless. Impossible is nothing. Possible is everything. Got it.

Q's

Why do you look away when you talk to me? Why is the grass greener on the other side? When and where is your final stop? Why does the blue sky make me cry? What is so romantic about romantic transcendence? Why can't drinking coffee be an indicator of how miserable your life is? How many cups do you drink a day? Can you pour some of your love in my cup? Why do only the fool fall in love? Do you think I'm sexy? How did the blind manage it during the earth hour? Who burnt my blanket with a cigarette butt? Why so generous? Is the enjoyment in heaven and the enjoyed on earth? Do good stories happen to those who can write them? Can I have a piece of that pie if you can't finish it? What are the ins and outs of osteoblast differentiation? Do you ever laugh when all you really want to do is to cry and vice versa? What is so green about the green revolution? Why are you so blue? Why are your cheeks so red? What is your favorite sound? Why did I watch so many Cinderella stories when I was young? Is it true that your soul is unbreakable? Why so cruel? Does my stupidity ever cross your mind? Why is smoking bad for your lungs but not your hands? Can elephants be kept as pets? What do you do when no one is watching? How many hearts does a snake have? Who is the hottest person you'd go out with? Can you stop staring at me? Don't you need to be transcended first to understand transcendental kissing? Will you love me for ever? Why can't you make me fall in love with you? Why doesn't anyone make out? Have you ever been to the other side of the moon before? Why do you ask so many pathetic questions? Does everything have to have a reason? Why do all questions end with a question mark?

Membering

It was hurting. Couldn't wait until I go home and pamper it, treat it like a helpless baby. It had a resonating pain in my ears so the story he was telling me was very vague. May be it is vague now that I am trying to re-member. I remember his hair well though. He knows I like his jumbled hair. I asked him once, long time ago, how do you make your hair like that? He said he goes to the salon everyday, the natural employers at the salon are wind, sun, rain, and snow. That stuck in my mind, so that even when he is re-incarnating a story of his, all I look at is the hairdo. What direction was the wind blowing? Was it sunny today? Can I look at his hair at the end of the day and tell the story of how his day was? Is his hair a mirror of his outside world? How come the wind doesn't make my hair that tantalizing? How can I internalize his hot gray hair follicles without eating his hair, so I re-member them forever? WHAT? He goes, are you listening? I say yeah, carry on please, I was looking at your hair. He goes, I especially didn't comb it for you. Back to the story, re-membering it as if it's a human being waiting to be introduced to other fellow members. His story was actually about a human being, about him, so re-membering isn't too far impersonal in this case. He was wild and crazy when he was young so he went through the same pain, but much worse. He went all the way on top of the cliff and fell. I was way lucky now that I was introduced to his painful re-membrance, but that didn't take away from my pain. First hand pains are always more enjoyable, because they are easier to re-member later on. I don't need to scratch my head to re-member what he went through. Mine would just come naturally now. Natural organic re-membrance encarved in my mind, no, not my body because pain instills no body memory after healing. I will always re-member even if I don't re-incarnate the story alive for you.

Nothing

To..say.
Today.

[Idle Mind,
[Recycled Words,
[Coming to a factory near you,

Happy.
Monday.

sub-stance

I don't want to know you, really, because I won't.
I want to know what you are really about, deep down in your soul, really.
I mean really really. What is burning you in your soul?
I don't want masked gimmicks, really.
I need real substance in a burning soul to be eager to follow, really.
I mean really really and slowly, show me what you are made up of, really really.
Potion in a golden bowl, really.

Social History

Everyone gossips about everyone, in the form of stories, i.e. 'what happened'. These stories build up until there are social, political, and religious movements associated with them. The more a person is the subject of gossip, the less significant that person becomes and the more significant the stories. The person gets buried under the stories so there is no more fresh air to breathe anymore. This person should either hide, commit suicide, travel to a far away land, or just don't care about stories in order to be able to continue living, and I have some criteria for living that I don't need to get into. This is the case with many figures in history books. Some historians are a bunch of gossipers. The bigger the story they make, the thicker the book gets, and the more they appraise somebody and condemn another, the bigger and dirtier their mouth. We then appraise the historian and call them scholars.
But the point to catch from all these written work is content, professionalism, context, a deep understanding of human condition, so that we can discern the rightness and wrongness. So that when one person is unfairly praised, then there could be some potential fallacy in the viewpoint. I know rightness and wrongness are relative, but there are absolute right and wrong gods resting somewhere, probably sleeping by now, they are alittle bit shy.
Among all these junk history texts, get to know the works of Adamiyat. I think he had a subjective and objective understanding of the past of many regions, an objective understanding of what the learnt lessons could show, and a vision for the future. His personal gossip I don't know and don't care much to know. And no, I am not trying to make more gossip about him. Find out for yourself.

[Maybe this is why I like the Biological History better. Biological history is so safe and clean and peacefully intricate. The fossils are set in stone. They are not like humans, who can change their point of views one way or another depending on the weather channel.]

Rain

On roof.
Today.

Sun

In sky.
Today.

Animalism

Every single law, every detailed regulation, every organized order, in our biological system, in our social relationships, our econo-political identity, and our global awareness has its roots deep within our survival as human species.

Are we by any means more deserving to survive? We are here because trees are, fish are, turtles are, tigers are, elephants are, birds are, monkeys are. Is advocating the laws in favor of other species a mere joke? Can we ever be completely graceful and grateful to nature outside of our own sphere? Can we ever live in absolute harmony with the rules of jungle?

Smile

Death is near. Smile
Life is here. Smile
Don't go crazy and cry. Smile
Don't go frenzy and fry. Smile
The lines you fell in love with were a paper joke. Smile
The God you idolized was alone like you. Smile
All and all is a mirage. Smile

Birds

Sing.
Today.

Media

Do not expose your kids to media. They control minds and hearts and souls. If you want originality, humanity, creativity, inspiration, love, peace, commitment, life, anger, hate, death, domination, jealousy, showing in your kids at the right time and right place, raise them in a jungle with many willow trees, a lake, a wooden house with enough food, bears, wolves, snails, squirrels, mice, rats, mushrooms, birds, and eagles...with no mom and no dad...



[Information can tell us everything. It has all the answers. But they are answers to questions we have not asked, and which doubtless don't even arise.
Jean Baudrillard]

Earth-Sky-Stars-Day-Night

EuphoriaEuphoria Euphoria.
StimulationStimulation Stimulation.
SanctitySanctity Sanctity.
DelectationDelectation Delectation.
NauseaNausea Nausea.

[Maddening Bliss]

Politics

A lecture on politics of the 21st century

Point was intellectuals are not necessarily academics and academics are not necessarily intellectuals. Intellectuals are those who voice their opinions in a social, political, economical, religious way.

But I mean who is someone who is in the process of working on an idea, say world hunger through research on genetically modified crop and does not have the means necessary to go out there and shout at the social, political, and economical system or even if he or she can shout, has nothing new or more important than what is out there already to say? This is my immediate emotional response. My second emotional response is related to some dangers of the classification systems we come up with. I may think of more to say later.

A biological standpoint by Darwin: It is not the strongest species that survive, nor the most intelligent, but the ones most responsive to change.

A point I really liked however was that you can't simplify all of philosophy or philosophical thought using a comic strip [was that a critic to Persepolis? I don't know]. Simplicity is good, but complexity behind simplicity is better.

[I have a headache now. I really do. Tylenol was the best political invention of the 21st century. I don't mean to make fun. I really don't. This is a serious matter. Let's take it seriously. But serious enough to keep us headache free.]

A......B

A. KSDGHQ;HJSKAPSGHLSGHJ

B. When did I do that?

A. DKGHOAFGRFLGJ#$(T&@)QOHF)@RDKFH KDHFKDHFS FSDF OIO$I*%)#$*N N*@(#*%V(*@(YCIEHKDHFIDYFIDGFSLGKRIHGHSLGNMDNV

B. I never said that. Even if I did, what I meant by it was absolutely something else. Come on, are you paranoid?


A. #%*OWJFSLDJVMOSDJGAOFKIEO^(E$WOJFOSJDASFJA

B. Fine. But, what is my fault?

A. KDSFOAJSFOAPFSGKSDKGAKGI#U$(^%@(%U@HB#I%KHKGW

B. Okay, sorry.

A. SDLGOALSFLAGNKVNOGJAPFK:DKGFKGOWUT#*(%&@(#%*@QOHEKJFAKF



[The danger of communication is mis-communication]
1. Chose silence. 2. Be ware. 3. Think before talking. 4. Talk before thinking! 5. You hurt, you get hurt, deal with it. 6. If don't want to get hurt, don't hurt. 7. Be grateful of other's presence. 8. Thank them. 9. Be polite. 10. Don't push reactive buttons. 11. Establish boundaries. 12. Do I have to tell me everything? You tell me!

Across the universe

A visual extravaganza of 34 compositions of the Beatles, heightened my auditory senses to extremes.
A girl who came to stay.
A boy who came across the universe.
Arts. Encounters. Songs. Wars. Politics. Romances.
Acid, tempting.
All you need is love.
Love is all you need.

[The sad part? It ended on a happy note, like almost all hollywood movies.]

Few Fool Fool Full

Make a fool of yourself sometimes because either way, you are one!

Make a fool of others sometimes because otherwise they make a fool of you!

Recognize and acknowledge patterns of foolishness in yourself and others!

This whole thing isn't demeaning, it shows the already demeaned!

Love! Laugh! Learn! Live!

Laughter

Shake shake shake off winter melancholy with it.

Loneliness

Lonely. Loanly.
Moon is above the head of loneliness. [Sohrab]

Mr. TSB

Thank you for being.

Identity crisis

In logic, the Law of Identity states that an object is the same as itself: A ≡ A. A=A is a tautology.
There are different forms of identity in different fields. Identity in Logic philosophy is the sameness of two things. In Philosophy of mind, mind is identical to the brain. In Psychology, we are dealing with the collective self image of an individual that can be further integrated in the image of a community an individual is part of, and later on a bigger society where the field is changed to the Social identity. In Biological identity, we go back to the genotypes and phenotypes and environmental factors (nature and nurture). These are wonderful topics feeding the thoughts and lives of many investigators.

What engaged my mind today is: Identity in the field of Art. Is this known? Has there been research done on this?

My thoughts so far: the work of art created by an artist does not show the identity of the artist. The identity of artist is to be found in the many fields I mentioned above. An artist is just bold enough to express dreams, realities, illusions that show absolutely nothing about the identity of artist as a totality. Therefore, a work of art should be looked at independent of the artist. Knowing the biography may add a bit of humanity zest. Art in addition to peace, love, beauty is independent of us. Once produced, the identity can then be investigated and may be realized with an universal, mystic, philosophical, psychological, social, biological eye.


Why all this? I don't know what is happening to my identity. It is under a crisis. An explosive crisis like the world war III. Heal me. Who am I? Who are you? Who are we? Who aren't we? Who can we be? Who can't we be? Tell me. Tell you. Tell us. Don't tell. How public to tell. Words...words...signs...signs...silence...si...

[.Science.]

[...All there was
All there is.
All there will be...]

When not you, who?

Consider the history of civilization, read Will Durant if you don't know the history (all 20 volumes, I can't lend this to you ghosts, because it's one collection I am very sensitive at, I want to take the history of civilization to grave with me!). Then, whom would you chose to be if you could be someone other than yourself? (you could also chose an animal or a plant).

If I had only one choice, I would chose to be Einstein. My second choice is Gandhi. Third, Shakespeare. Fourth, elephant. Fifth, Siberian Tiger. Sixth, Arizona cactus. Seventh, Marijuana leaf (leave me alone). Eighth, water. Nineth, a cell (bone cell for the time being). Tenth, Myself (Nobody). Eleventh, Nietzsche.

10 Reasons: 1. He didn't make it in Durant's books, so he is even more original. 2. He was a German and a Jew (how stronger can you get in terms of race and religion?) 3. He was the best scientist but he had a profound sense of the divine (read his quotes). 4. He was best at what he did (Nobel prizes). 5. He was always alone (even with his closest family members). 6. He didn't need to go to a hair stylist, his hair would always look awesome, especially when he woke up in the morning (I am not making fun). 7. His ideas are closest to how I see the universe (this is my utmost egotistical statement). 8. He devoted his life to something bigger than himself. 9. I love him (he is my idol). 10. Leave private issues private!


References to find out more:
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Albert_Einstein
http://rescomp.stanford.edu/~cheshire/EinsteinQuotes.html

Stuck Market

How do you not get stuck in the world of your own makings? what are the Tools? do you Wait"s? listen to the Queens? Guns and Roses? become a Radiohead? Nirvana? Yeah. Yeah what? Yeah stuck. Ha-ha. Yeah stuck. Ha-ha. Yeah stuck. Ha...

Chicken or Egg?

Bunny!

In other words...

One page in one language is written in one page in another language. What happens during this? Is the translator an artist or a craftsman? Is there a difference between art and craft? I see a thin line. A very fine hair, like the line between love and hate, friends and enemies, men and women, yin and yang, one country and a second, one home to another, one page and another.

Translate your life from the original language (Myths) like an artist or a craftsman, paint it with bright colours, adorn it with music, write it with an expensive pen, mold it into a sculpture, frame it onto the wall of history.

Inner Child

Have you ever been at the age of four, fourteen, twenty four, thirty four, forty four, fifty four, and sixty four all at the same time? Sometimes it is hard for me to be contained and only contained in my skeletal box at a particular space at a particular time. I fly to the past, future, present, sky, earth, east, west, and all over the place.

In a movie by Bergman [I think Fanny and Alexander], someone says, you are always a kid, you just assume different roles in the course of your life. You become a daughter, a lover, a wife, a grandmother. However, you always remain that little kid. Dear ghosts, get to know your little kids, they are full of energy. They dance until they can't stand on their feet anymore. Let your kids live.

Life Pill

Take it one day at a time
It is only then that it will take a lifetime

Writings

I read them again, and I ask myself did I write this? or was it my hatred? my jealousy? my blue insecurity? my dotted confidence? my dark ignorance? my light knowledge? my smashed brain? my hand motions? my eye direction? my god's voice? my little playful kid? my rushing emotions? my mother? my father? my country? countries? pure madness? my friends and enemies (simultaneously)? my rock hard keyboard? my fanatic ego? How was I feeling at the time except that rush of blood to express?
Just so that my ghosts know what I write at a particular time may not apply at another particular time! World of uncertainty after all, right?

Shots of Hedonism

Relieve your stress of being by taking refuge to drugs, sexuality, shopping, movies, books, music, poetry, work, parties ... this is how we turn the wheels of social, economical, political, and religious systems.
Another alternative is shooting oneself in the head...don't try this at home though...or at least don't make a mess. Call me up before, I like brains...especially when they are smashed...

Spring

Make a wish...
Spring up...Spring down...
Spring sprung...
Happy Spring...

My will

Hereby, my being consists of my past, present, and future. If I die, which I suspect is sometime very soon (can't provide evidence here), I declaim all my being going to my mom and dad except for my heart and liver and kidneys and bladder that are taken with my consent by the ministry of health for those in need. Mommy, daddy, please be strong, and fake your sadness every second. I was a good girl except for once, no twice, actually, um, more, no, no, more, um, yeah, oh oh, oops, yucks, what the heck, dang, darn, many times. God bless me. I love you both (in past present future tense).

..Um, mm, hmm, but it's not fair, I don't want to die yet. I want to die when I am 90.
...Shut up. Just die.
..ok :(

Arthur C. Clarke

Your inspirational contributions do not rest in peace, even if you do, at 90.

Festival of Fire

Fire fascinates. Everything can be thrown into it, but nothing comes out. It has room for everyone and no one.

Burn your bad habits, sins, judgements, expectations, (selves and egos) in the fire within to purify and beautify your body and soul (selves).

Happy 4shanbeh soori.

Dog Party

You can't live your life happily unless you are following some profound guides. Otherwise, you are bound to wander until you find the guides. Wander, escape, or stick to the guides.
I escape the unsecure dog-eat-dog world for peace and happiness. No expectations from anyone.

Theatre Day

Hi. Why is theatre only for a small audience? I don't want to be cliche but Shakespeare never gets cliche so bear with me. He says "All the world is a stage, and all the men and women merely players". If we are all mere actors on life's stage, then we wouldn't go to a theatre to see someone else play, right? We want to be the actors, forever, and we want all the world to look at us, and see how we play, this could be called narcissism, but face it, we all have it. No, don't deny it now, if you do, you're not being honest with yourself. So, those few, who go and watch theatre live are able to share their world of acting. They can let another actor in, and be with them momentarily, while they are on life's stage on the stage with a spotlight. Support them so they can keep on showing you to yourselves like mirrors, 'standing in front of you to make an eternity of you' [I think this is Shamloo's loose translation into English]. Anyways, where was I? I don't know, but watch more theatre, it's good for your blood. I have to go back to the quote now, so when you're living, I mean right now, or whenever that you're living, think of yourself being on stage with spotlights on you and think of others around you as being on stage always and forever. This way, you bear the unbearable heavy load of the lightness of being (Stolen from Kundera with integrity). That's it about what I wanted to say, but I have to say something else that's pending. I have to say it because of the respect I have for Shakespeare, I think he knew something we don't know, a genius, and I try not to use this term loosely. Anyways, here it is: If you act on the stage of theatre, then you are an actor in life! This is to acknowledge my friend who acts Shakespearean on the stage of theatre, so this friend may also know something we don't know because he has chosen to play what Shakespeare has chosen to say to show you to you (mirror analogy coming back here thanks to Shamloo). This is all I wanted to say. Don't scratch the mirrors, look at yourselves in them. I mean go watch more theatre. Okay, I said too much. Enough say said. Bye.






"All the world's a stage, and all the men and women merely players: they have their exits and their entrances; and one man in his time plays many parts, his acts being seven ages. "
William Shakespeare

Pray

Hare Krishna Hare Krishna
Krishna Krishna Hare Hare

On Love

Love can not be personified. It is not a human, it's a shape, a voice, a note, a tone, a song, a book, a line of poetry, a flower, a colour, a pattern, a picture, a memory from pre-historic times, a light, a dark, a shadow, a music, a rain, a dog, a word, a bird, an eagle, a plant, a cell, a movie, a hug, a kiss, a wine, the sun, the moon, the clouds, an idea, a cup of hot chocolate in the snow, a smile, a cry, a gray Sunday afternoon. Love is life. Love is being. Humanity. Forever.

Intelligence

Intelligence is the selective process of discarding certain visual, auditory, tactile, gustatory, and olfactory (plus your 6th and 7th sense) information and choosing some others instead. This is first done consciously until it becomes second nature. Be intelligent.

Art of Puppetry

For animating the inanimate, we need a stage with light, sound, music, shadows, materials, objects, colours, characters, voices, tastes, language, words, words, words...
Re-animate your body and soul on your life's stage by learning a new language.

Twilight

The day, the night.
The snow came down.
The light in sky.
The wind blew songs.
The blow got strong.
The dark in sky.
The sun came up.
The snow melt down.
The light in sky.
The day, the night.

Wolverines

So, California identifies first wolverine in 80 years! This animal doesn't cease to amaze me. Should it go extinct just because it's a mutant? Is the animal kingdom that destructive that it leaves no space for the survival of this animal's keen sense with healing physical capabilities? Whatever it is, wolverines know where they stand. That is why they hide, and you see one in every 80 years, and by pure coincidence too, a photographer passing by lake Tahoe's International Forest. They know where they stand, that is why they don't stand on your way, nor in animal kingdom's way either. Their strong survival instincts recover these masters of hand-to-hand combat and martial arts from virtually any wound. Is that why they have been used as fictional characters, like in the Incredible Hulk? The first written wolverine's catch phrase is "I'm the best there is at what I do, but what I do isn't very nice". So dear ghosts, here's my request. For the sake of their integrity, and instead of having one minute of silence in their remembrance, put yourself in their body and read this post again, and then walk in their shoes with my words, just so that you live with their spirit this once, if not with their actual presence, like the dogs and cats and fish you keep! Why would we always keep the roses and throw away the leaves and thorns? I am a thorn myself, so I am a big advocate of a thorn campaign. The meeting place is behind the bushes. With the wolverines I mean.




References:
http://www.thedailygreen.com/environmental-news/latest/wolverine-california-47030803?kw=ist
http://animals.nationalgeographic.com/animals/printable/wolverine.html
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Wolverine

Strange mingles

Dance to the music beats of your life with your dancing heart beats...everyday...

Beckett

Let's go.
We can't.
Why not?
We are waiting for Godot.
Oh.

How many social, political, economical, religious systems can you see in these five lines? Count them all up. Let me know what I missed.

Metamorphasis

Watching faces on monitors. Looking at self on the screen. Listening to dead ipod voices. Talking through typing. Touching the keypad buttons. Smelling vitamin pills on the desk. Tasting fresh brewed coffee out of a vending machine. Ordering grocery online. Keeping warm with a heater by the desk. Passing technological time in a technological space. Loss of muscle mass, bone density, eye sight, and skeletal balance. Where are the real eyes? ears? tongues? skins? Masters transformed to slaves, of their own machines.

Volume V, Chapter IV, Page XII, Paragraph III

Line II
Find me there

Your name is no accident!

Live it up high!

Creativity with Integrity

Be a creator of your life not a creation of your life. Refuse to accept what others create for you if it's not your choice. And don't get dissapointed if your creativity gets put down, create another one! You will love life better that way.

Organic Living

Listen to your body. It tells you when and what you need to drink or eat. What color dress suits you today. Where and why and when you need to go, or come. What you need to do. Your body talks to you every second with every heartbeat.
If you don't listen to it, it gets fat, or skinny, or dehydrated, or hungry.
If you are not in a conversation with it, you get headaches, backaches, poor vision, and insomnia.
If you still refuse to listen after these signs, you will get cancer and die.
Be in a conversation with your body. Sleep with your body sometimes. Take care of it. Consult your soul. Get it checked sometimes. Do what it takes you to do to live it up high before you get cancer and die! See it rhymes!

Snowy Leap

Leap year is a year where everyone leaps. Leap it up! Leap it down! You have another option, and that is not leaping. Leaping to the left and right is another possibility but I don't recommend. Whatever makes you happy. Whatever you want. At the end of the day. You will hug the ground anyway

Zorba the Buddha

Yes, Deal with it!

The Workings of the Mind

Reality shows on TV are not Real. Seeing is not believing. Hearing is not believing. Seeing and believing are not real. Those realities are mere juxtapositions of the mind. Smash them up, and grind them at your closest butcher shop. What you make is real. Real or unreal really become real or unreal in time and space.

Bursting Birthday Balloon

I feel like my life is expanding like a pink giant elephant balloon to new horizons, the other side of which I cannot see. Things have pulled me in them, like a big black hole, and since I am only one person, I have to cut myself up into pieces so I have time to allocate to each busy-ness. Not that I am complaining. I quite like the fact to be honest. However, this expansion is doomed to contraction like every pink giant elephant balloon that has its hay days before it's bursted by a funny little kid's sharp stone who says "HA-HA" at the end of stories. So I am taking more time off from writing here so I can do some more non-fun and fun stuff in the life of that balloon. I have a needle handy though and if I see it gets in my way in any way irritating, I will burst it and come here as religiously as I have been. In the meantime, you save your donations in a safe place, preferably in your pants' left pocket to pass them all over, and remember the more the merrier. Hug your parents. Listen to music. And fill and burst those sucker balloons.

Dear Ghosts

Except for Mr. L. who is kind enough to read and leave me comments religiously, I would like to put out a request to all my other ghosts who come here, read, and leave without leaving comments. The number count tells me there's more visitors than Mr. L, and inspiration is not free. So, here it is. Everytime you come here and like a post, put aside five to ten dollars or even a penny from your budget and pass them up to me when you see me. Ofcourse you may decide to give more or less for a good cause depending on your generosity and discretion. I am trying to organize a trip to Peru, a place that has always inspired me ever since I was a little kid and read Erich Von Daniken's books specially his "Chariots of the Gods" which was banned in Iran at the time and I read it in my uncle's hidden basement with a childish fear thinking what would happen if anyone found out, with my cousin (same uncle's daddy) so she is probably inspired by the same book, that's why we both agreed on the same place (Peru ye pedar sag, sorry I had to say it). And I just had a car accident so my expenses have gone up. Please pass your donations my way so I can get the f*** out of here, get more inspired by the culture and come back here with a full hand. Your money goes a long way, I promise. A lot of these writings have been inspired by my travels to Isfahan, Turkey, China, Brussels, Holland, Spain, Germany, UK, France, Mexico, and the sleeping elephant south the border. Thank you.